– details about date nights (when they arrive, how often they arrive, what they should be frequent, who plans them, the balance between stay at home appointment nights and special appointments, etc.) During the relationship, this agreement can be helpful in describing how you and your partner manage your day-to-day finances, including sharing rents, mortgage payments and bills. The agreement can also determine which partner owns what – and to what extent – and allow you to agree on how your property (including personal effects, savings and other assets) is divided in the event of a relationship breakdown. If the relationship ends for any reason, the result can be quite chaotic and expensive. Parties who co-exist without marriage and who jointly carry out larger real estate transactions, such as real estate investments, risk losing interest in the property, especially if a person concludes a transaction without the agreement or participation of his partner. Some states will grant de facto marital rights to couples who live with particular characteristics or after a certain period of time. Unfortunately, this can be detrimental to couples who remain forever separated from each of their assets and debts. Just like the canaries used by miners to prevent gas leaks, explicit discussion of fears can help you see when your relationship enters dangerous terrain. You may be concerned that your partner`s family will enter into your relationship, that the two of you will separate, that your partner will have an affair, that you will have to sacrifice your career for that of your partner, that you may not be able to have children. The list may seem endless.
But as the Roman philosopher Seneca wrote, “We suffer more from imagination than from reality.” When couples give themselves permission to reflect and talk about their fears, they build greater mutual sensitivity and support and can take preventive measures to prevent these fears from occurring. For example, if you are interested in a risky career change but are concerned that financial commitments will prevent it, you may agree to a reduction in family expenses to create a financial buffer. The new visit and the update of your social contract should be between 6 and 12 months. This is ideally recommended. Don`t wait for it to reach a point where it doesn`t matter. It`s supposed to be a routine. If you break certain parts of your relationship agreement, remember affectionately this particular agreement, then do your best to continue to respect it from this point. Developing a relationship agreement is an essential way to achieve clarity and adaptation to your long-term goals within a couple. For example, it is assumed that intimacy and romance are the food that nurtures a relationship, but they depend on the intent behind romantic gestures and the kind of intimacy that thrives in a relationship.